The Shame is Real

I see you there. You read the title and started nodding vigorously. Anyone identifying as a parent has been shamed at some point in their quest for survival and joy.

Here is an exhausting list of things parents get shamed for. It's okay to laugh.

...then sigh. And remember, live and let live. We're all on the same team here.

  • Having an epidural

  • Having an emergency or elected C-section

  • Having a home birth

  • Having or acquiring a baby any kind of way

  • Not losing weight fast enough after birth

  • Losing weight too quickly

  • Dropping a bite of guac on the baby's head while you desperately try to eat your first meal in 12 hours.

  • Breastfeeding in public

  • Breastfeeding for over a year

  • Pumping at work

  • Breastfeeding at all

  • Formula feeding

  • Bottle Feeding any liquid

  • Not picking your baby up fast up enough when they're crying

  • Not letting your baby cry for a minute before picking them up

  • Holding your baby as they fall asleep

  • Putting your baby down, swaddled, to sleep

  • Nursing your baby to sleep

  • Not dressing your baby warm enough in the winter or cool enough in the summer

  • Not putting a towel on your baby fast enough after a bath.

  • Bringing your baby out in public too soon because you needed groceries

  • Not having a partner

  • Having a partner, but they're not standing right next to you at the moment

  • Having a child whose gender is too hard to guess

  • Having a child whose name is too “weird”

  • Having breasts

  • Not having breasts

  • Having a body with limbs and moving blood.

  • Breathing

Did I miss anything? Of course I did!

But seriously— be kind to yourself. You’re doing great, ok?